7 Drastic Ways To Boost Your Sex Life Using Candles
A great sex life looks different to everyone. Whereas some people might boast about doing it three times a day, seven days a week, another’s sweet spot could be once a month or less. It all depends on where you are mentally and whether you have the time to get down to it.
Modern life is fast-paced, and stress or other mental health issues take priority. Yet many couples struggle to get in the mood. Over time you may feel less connected to your partner or like you’re physically growing apart.
Sex is essential, but it’s also vital to see it as not just a pleasurable activity but a way to form a more profound and meaningful connection.
- Massage candles
Massages are a great way to stimulate the senses and release your pleasure hormones. The feeling of silky skin and your sexual partner working your tense muscles is a great way to relax before sex, especially if you have sexual anxiety.
You can get two-in-one massage candles, so you have the benefit of a calming scent while you work out how on earth to use it as a massage oil.
Either direct your partner to where it feels good or let them take the lead and enjoy the element of surprise. You can do it bare butt, or you can slowly take clothing off to enhance anticipation.
- Japanese Hot Wax Drip Candles
Otherwise known as wax play, Japanese Hot Wax Drip Candles fire up your senses before sex. If you like a bit of bondage or experimenting with sensations on your skin, then they're the way to go.
Use candles that are specifically designed for sex. Any old candle will be too hot, and candles designed specifically for wax play contain moisturising oils for a smoother, silkier experience.
You can opt for scented or unscented. Wax play candles are typically made from soy wax as it has a lower melting point to prevent scalding the skin.
- Burn candles with scents to increase arousal.
Whereas some scents relax the mind, others can scientifically act as aphrodisiacs. Aphrodisiacs increase sexual desire, so implementing them into your sex life is a great idea to get you in the mood.
Vanilla candles, jasmine, blood orange and sandalwood are a sure way to jump into bed with your partner.
- Light up the bedroom
There’s nothing like harsh lighting to kill the mood. Decorating the room with candles creates a romantic atmosphere and relaxes your body and mind.
Add a variety of candles around the bedroom and enjoy slowly lighting each candle as your partner kisses your neck or tells you what they want to do tonight. It will induce a sense of anticipation, and your body will associate candles with pleasure.
Make sure you place the candles in a safe place (nowhere they can be knocked over), and don’t make the room too hot!
- Check-in with yourself.
Sometimes we don’t know if we want sex or just a cuddle. It can be hard to differentiate emotions, wants or needs if you’re not used to feeling them.
Light a candle and take a moment to check in with your body.
What are you feeling? Desire, wanting to be close to your partner, physical touch, to express your love?
These things don’t always have to be physical, and you might not want them to be. On some days, just giving your partner a long hug and saying you love them is enough.
- Communicate with your partner
Communicating with your partner means anything from telling them what you want in the bedroom to working through unresolved arguments or discussing trauma affecting your sex life.
Create a calming environment using candles and sit on the floor with your partner for a focused discussion. Instead of being trapped in a bubble and feeling like they don’t understand you, open up emotionally.
Although it may not seem an obvious way to improve your sex life, it can have tremendous positive effects in the long term. You can work through any emotions or experiences that may be affecting your sex life and feel closer to your partner.
Your partner isn’t aware of your thoughts unless you tell them! So say what’s on your mind and have a mature conversation in a safe environment.
- Use candles for mindfulness
Performance anxiety or general anxiety can heighten in the bedroom. Daily mindfulness helps manage overwhelming thoughts and feelings.
Light your favourite candle once a day and sit in front of it for a few minutes. Listen to your breath and note any thoughts or feelings that arise. Pay attention to what your body wants and needs. If you listen to what you need physically and emotionally, you are more likely to be in a better headspace for sex.
Using candles is a great way to ignite your sex life (pun intended!)
Candles don’t just help your romantic life with their arousing scents or sexy hot wax. They are there to balance the mind and connect with your partner.
Instead of seeing candles as a pretty object to use occasionally, try adding them into your sex routine. In not too long, you’ll start to see the benefit in yourself and your sex life.